Friday, August 24, 2007
Late Nite Jokes
David Letterman
There is a tri-state area dog food recall. The tainted dog food will be rounded up and fed to Michael Vick.
Michael Vick pled guilty to dog fighting charges, and he may do jail time. And the say this guy went through more dogs than Bill Clinton.
The Falcons, Vick’s team, is still waiting to see if Vick violated the NFL personal conduct policy. And I was stunned. I said to myself, “The NFL has a personal conduct policy?”
Here’s news: A 90-year-old man has become a father. I’m lucky at my age if I can get the cap off the Viagra.
Craig Ferguson
Not such a great day for Brazil. Vampire bat attacks on cattle have reached a record high. Cows are being attacked by vampires. I think we know where Bob Barker went for retirement.
Not such a great day for Beyonce. Apparently a crowd at a Toronto concert got a look at Beyonce’s boobies. Beyonce jumped off some stairs just as a gust of wind blew her dress up. Or as I call it — perfect storm.
There’s a new study that comes out today. It says breaking up isn’t hard to do. You should always consider where you get relationship advice from. Should you be getting relationship advice from scientists? Scientists are pasty, pear-shaped mouse torturers . . . what do they know about relationships?
David Letterman
There is a tri-state area dog food recall. The tainted dog food will be rounded up and fed to Michael Vick.
Michael Vick pled guilty to dog fighting charges, and he may do jail time. And the say this guy went through more dogs than Bill Clinton.
The Falcons, Vick’s team, is still waiting to see if Vick violated the NFL personal conduct policy. And I was stunned. I said to myself, “The NFL has a personal conduct policy?”
Here’s news: A 90-year-old man has become a father. I’m lucky at my age if I can get the cap off the Viagra.
Craig Ferguson
Not such a great day for Brazil. Vampire bat attacks on cattle have reached a record high. Cows are being attacked by vampires. I think we know where Bob Barker went for retirement.
Not such a great day for Beyonce. Apparently a crowd at a Toronto concert got a look at Beyonce’s boobies. Beyonce jumped off some stairs just as a gust of wind blew her dress up. Or as I call it — perfect storm.
There’s a new study that comes out today. It says breaking up isn’t hard to do. You should always consider where you get relationship advice from. Should you be getting relationship advice from scientists? Scientists are pasty, pear-shaped mouse torturers . . . what do they know about relationships?
