Friday, September 15, 2006
Late Nite Jokes
Leno
Britney Spears has given birth to a six pound eleven ounce boy. The name of the baby is Larry the Cable Guy Federline.
Actually when the baby was born Britney requested that the cord stay attached to make it easier to carry.
The price of gas is supposed to be down to $2 per gallon by Thanksgiving. The bad news is that turkey will be $80 per pound.
Hillary Clinton’s opponent in the New York Senate race has been married three times and had two kids with his chief of staff while married to another woman. For the first time a Clinton is the family values candidate.
A man by the name of Ulysses S. Grant won a race in Delaware and believes that his name helped him win. It didn’t work out so well for his opponent – Fred bin Laden.
A 79 year old woman in Chicago was arrested for robbing a bank. She’s being extradited to Florida so she can be tried as a juvenile.
Jackie Chan is upset that he is only in martial arts movies. He wants other roles. Why doesn’t he do what normal people do and run for governor?
The U.S. Department of Justice has broken up a 14 year old drug ring – Whitney Huston and Bobby Brown.
Conan
Bravo has announced that next year they will start a gay version of "The View”. Gay people everywhere are saying, "I thought the gay version of The View was The View.”
Leno
Britney Spears has given birth to a six pound eleven ounce boy. The name of the baby is Larry the Cable Guy Federline.
Actually when the baby was born Britney requested that the cord stay attached to make it easier to carry.
The price of gas is supposed to be down to $2 per gallon by Thanksgiving. The bad news is that turkey will be $80 per pound.
Hillary Clinton’s opponent in the New York Senate race has been married three times and had two kids with his chief of staff while married to another woman. For the first time a Clinton is the family values candidate.
A man by the name of Ulysses S. Grant won a race in Delaware and believes that his name helped him win. It didn’t work out so well for his opponent – Fred bin Laden.
A 79 year old woman in Chicago was arrested for robbing a bank. She’s being extradited to Florida so she can be tried as a juvenile.
Jackie Chan is upset that he is only in martial arts movies. He wants other roles. Why doesn’t he do what normal people do and run for governor?
The U.S. Department of Justice has broken up a 14 year old drug ring – Whitney Huston and Bobby Brown.
Conan
Bravo has announced that next year they will start a gay version of "The View”. Gay people everywhere are saying, "I thought the gay version of The View was The View.”
