Friday, June 30, 2006
Late Nite Jokes
Leno
"Time” magazine’s cover story this week is on President Teddy Roosevelt, the man who said, "Speak softly and carry a big stick.” I’m sorry, that was Rush Limbaugh.
I always get those two confused because Teddy Roosevelt is on Mount Rushmore, Rush wanted to mount more.
Rush was talking about it on his show this week. He said that he was on a "boys only trip”. Here’s my question - if he’s on a boys only trip, why is he taking Viagra?
More news coming out about those seven men in Miami that the FBI arrested, that were planning on blowing up the sears tower in Chicago. It seems they pledged allegiance to al Qaeda and were after virgins in the afterlife because they couldn't find any in Miami.
Military commanders in Iraq say the day is fast approaching when we’ll start withdrawing our troops. I believe that day is called Election Day.
In a speech in Washington, D.C., Delaware Senator Joe Biden said although he wants to be president he’d rather be at home making love to his wife. Which is ironic because Bill Clinton said the same thing. He said he also would rather be home making love to Joe Biden’s wife too.
Letterman
Rush Limbaugh was caught at an airport for illegally processing Viagra. Another victory for Homeland Security!
Leno
"Time” magazine’s cover story this week is on President Teddy Roosevelt, the man who said, "Speak softly and carry a big stick.” I’m sorry, that was Rush Limbaugh.
I always get those two confused because Teddy Roosevelt is on Mount Rushmore, Rush wanted to mount more.
Rush was talking about it on his show this week. He said that he was on a "boys only trip”. Here’s my question - if he’s on a boys only trip, why is he taking Viagra?
More news coming out about those seven men in Miami that the FBI arrested, that were planning on blowing up the sears tower in Chicago. It seems they pledged allegiance to al Qaeda and were after virgins in the afterlife because they couldn't find any in Miami.
Military commanders in Iraq say the day is fast approaching when we’ll start withdrawing our troops. I believe that day is called Election Day.
In a speech in Washington, D.C., Delaware Senator Joe Biden said although he wants to be president he’d rather be at home making love to his wife. Which is ironic because Bill Clinton said the same thing. He said he also would rather be home making love to Joe Biden’s wife too.
Letterman
Rush Limbaugh was caught at an airport for illegally processing Viagra. Another victory for Homeland Security!
