Saturday, May 6, 2006
Late Nite Jokes
Leno
Well happy Cinco de Mayo everybody. This is a holiday celebrated by over 80 million Mexicans. And those are just the ones here in L.A.
Please don't confuse this holiday with NBC were it's Cinco de Ratings. That's totally different.
Congressman Patrick Kennedy celebrated Cinco de Mayo a little bit differently. He used his car as a pinata.
Did you hear his excuse for hitting the barrier? He said he had to swerve to avoid hitting Ted Kennedy who was crawling home. I don't know what was going on there.
I guess apple doesn't stagger far from the tree, does it?
Today Kennedy blamed his seemingly intoxicated state after the car crash on a sleeping medication... I believe it's called Jaggermeister.
You know what we should do, the next time a Kennedy gets in a car late at night, wake up Dick Cheney and have him shoot out the tires.
According to a new geographic literacy study 4 out of 10 American students couldn't find Iraq on a map. However 10 out of 10 Mexicans could find the U.S. without a map.
Bob Dylan's new radio show begins on XM Radio this week. I understand it's also being simulcast in English.
Just 24 hours after golfer John Daly said he had a gambling problem, Charles Barkley revealed he lost $10 million in Las Vegas. And that was just at the buffet table.
Leno
Well happy Cinco de Mayo everybody. This is a holiday celebrated by over 80 million Mexicans. And those are just the ones here in L.A.
Please don't confuse this holiday with NBC were it's Cinco de Ratings. That's totally different.
Congressman Patrick Kennedy celebrated Cinco de Mayo a little bit differently. He used his car as a pinata.
Did you hear his excuse for hitting the barrier? He said he had to swerve to avoid hitting Ted Kennedy who was crawling home. I don't know what was going on there.
I guess apple doesn't stagger far from the tree, does it?
Today Kennedy blamed his seemingly intoxicated state after the car crash on a sleeping medication... I believe it's called Jaggermeister.
You know what we should do, the next time a Kennedy gets in a car late at night, wake up Dick Cheney and have him shoot out the tires.
According to a new geographic literacy study 4 out of 10 American students couldn't find Iraq on a map. However 10 out of 10 Mexicans could find the U.S. without a map.
Bob Dylan's new radio show begins on XM Radio this week. I understand it's also being simulcast in English.
Just 24 hours after golfer John Daly said he had a gambling problem, Charles Barkley revealed he lost $10 million in Las Vegas. And that was just at the buffet table.
