Monday, March 27, 2006
'Demanding' Kerry Won't Do Ketchup
John Kerry’s list of travel demands makes Dick Cheney "look like a travelin’ rube,” according to the Smoking Gun, an online site that has obtained both the vice president’s and Senator Kerry’s lists of demands.
Kerry’s demand list was compiled during the 2004 presidential campaign and circulated by the would-be president’s advance team to prepare hotels for a Kerry visit.
The documents reveal that Kerry "hates celery,” and instructs, "NEVER order Tomato based products OR sandwiches [sic].” Thus, ketchup, the condiment that made Mrs. Heinz Kerry’s previous husband enormously wealthy, is out of the question.
Kerry does like fruits – especially bananas, apples, oranges and grapes.
If he’s going to have bottled water, and hotels are instructed that "bottled water must be everyplace that JK is,” he prefers Poland Spring. "No Evian,” hotels are instructed.
And don’t dare give him a "regular old stationery bike." "JK,” as the documents refer to him, "would prefer a recumbent bike these days.”
As for his hotel room, accommodators are told, "The phone and the ability to order movies in-suite should always be turned on and ready to go for JK’s arrival.”
"I know this may seem trivial,” the primer continues, "but these things make JK very happy.”
John Kerry’s list of travel demands makes Dick Cheney "look like a travelin’ rube,” according to the Smoking Gun, an online site that has obtained both the vice president’s and Senator Kerry’s lists of demands.
Kerry’s demand list was compiled during the 2004 presidential campaign and circulated by the would-be president’s advance team to prepare hotels for a Kerry visit.
The documents reveal that Kerry "hates celery,” and instructs, "NEVER order Tomato based products OR sandwiches [sic].” Thus, ketchup, the condiment that made Mrs. Heinz Kerry’s previous husband enormously wealthy, is out of the question.
Kerry does like fruits – especially bananas, apples, oranges and grapes.
If he’s going to have bottled water, and hotels are instructed that "bottled water must be everyplace that JK is,” he prefers Poland Spring. "No Evian,” hotels are instructed.
And don’t dare give him a "regular old stationery bike." "JK,” as the documents refer to him, "would prefer a recumbent bike these days.”
As for his hotel room, accommodators are told, "The phone and the ability to order movies in-suite should always be turned on and ready to go for JK’s arrival.”
"I know this may seem trivial,” the primer continues, "but these things make JK very happy.”
