Thursday, January 19, 2006
Late Nite Jokes
Leno
It was so cold in L.A. Shaq and Kobe are now hugging for warmth.
In the Midwest it was so cold some people were actually forced to stay inside and watch NBC.
It was so cold in New Jersey, people were using their mullets as a scarf!
This week the government is scheduled to launch a mission to Pluto. It's President Bush's last chance to find those weapons of mass destruction.
Al Gore was pretty upset too. Did you hear his speech? I haven’t seen Gore this angry since they charged him for two seats on a Southwest Airlines flight.
Here is an odd story. A dentist in Britain has been banned from practicing dentistry after she allowed her unlicensed and untrained boyfriend to perform dental work on patients. How amazing is that? They have dentists in Britain? Who knew?
Some sad news. The rumor going around, after 14 years of marriage, Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown may be splitting up. I guess Whitney came home early one day and caught bobby hitting other women.
It should be pretty easy to divide up their assets…just use a credit card.
Letterman
It’s been rainy and windy here in New York City. And I hate that here because everywhere you go there’s that wet King Kong smell.
Did you see the "Skating With Celebrities” show tonight? What a great show. At the end of the show Tonya Harding shot Robert Blake.
Conan
President Bush met with the Prime Minister of Belgium and there was a tense moment when the Prime Minister demanded that the prison in Guantanmo Bay be closed. President Bush responded by saying, "It is closed. That’s how we keep the prisoners in there!”
Leno
It was so cold in L.A. Shaq and Kobe are now hugging for warmth.
In the Midwest it was so cold some people were actually forced to stay inside and watch NBC.
It was so cold in New Jersey, people were using their mullets as a scarf!
This week the government is scheduled to launch a mission to Pluto. It's President Bush's last chance to find those weapons of mass destruction.
Al Gore was pretty upset too. Did you hear his speech? I haven’t seen Gore this angry since they charged him for two seats on a Southwest Airlines flight.
Here is an odd story. A dentist in Britain has been banned from practicing dentistry after she allowed her unlicensed and untrained boyfriend to perform dental work on patients. How amazing is that? They have dentists in Britain? Who knew?
Some sad news. The rumor going around, after 14 years of marriage, Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown may be splitting up. I guess Whitney came home early one day and caught bobby hitting other women.
It should be pretty easy to divide up their assets…just use a credit card.
Letterman
It’s been rainy and windy here in New York City. And I hate that here because everywhere you go there’s that wet King Kong smell.
Did you see the "Skating With Celebrities” show tonight? What a great show. At the end of the show Tonya Harding shot Robert Blake.
Conan
President Bush met with the Prime Minister of Belgium and there was a tense moment when the Prime Minister demanded that the prison in Guantanmo Bay be closed. President Bush responded by saying, "It is closed. That’s how we keep the prisoners in there!”
