Friday, July 30, 2004
Leno
We’re learning more and more about potential first lady Teresa Heinz Kerry. Very well educated woman. Did you know that? In fact she can say "shove it” in five different languages.
John Kerry said he would never criticize his wife. When reporters asked him why, he said he had over a billion reasons.
Lance Armstrong is on his way home and he’s being called a hero for all Americans. President Bush called Lance Armstrong and asked what it’s like to win again in 2004? And then President Clinton called him and asked what it’s like being out with Sheryl Crow?
As you know the Democrats are meeting in Boston this week for their convention and I this was nice. For an extra 50 bucks the hookers will dress up like Paul Revere.
Letterman
Have you been watching the Democratic National Convention? I haven’t seen this much excitement since the Dukakis-Bentsen era!
I didn’t see the convention last night. I was watching a documentary on condensation played on the Weather Channel.
Teresa Heinz Kerry spoke last night. She made the mistake of talking and holding a chihuahua at the same time.
Dennis Kucinich also spoke. The side effects of watching him included drowsiness, headache and sexual dysfunction.
Kilborn
John Edwards was asked to describe what it was like to be around John Kerry and he said, "He’s strong, he’s decisive, and he hogs the covers.”
We’re learning more and more about potential first lady Teresa Heinz Kerry. Very well educated woman. Did you know that? In fact she can say "shove it” in five different languages.
John Kerry said he would never criticize his wife. When reporters asked him why, he said he had over a billion reasons.
Lance Armstrong is on his way home and he’s being called a hero for all Americans. President Bush called Lance Armstrong and asked what it’s like to win again in 2004? And then President Clinton called him and asked what it’s like being out with Sheryl Crow?
As you know the Democrats are meeting in Boston this week for their convention and I this was nice. For an extra 50 bucks the hookers will dress up like Paul Revere.
Letterman
Have you been watching the Democratic National Convention? I haven’t seen this much excitement since the Dukakis-Bentsen era!
I didn’t see the convention last night. I was watching a documentary on condensation played on the Weather Channel.
Teresa Heinz Kerry spoke last night. She made the mistake of talking and holding a chihuahua at the same time.
Dennis Kucinich also spoke. The side effects of watching him included drowsiness, headache and sexual dysfunction.
Kilborn
John Edwards was asked to describe what it was like to be around John Kerry and he said, "He’s strong, he’s decisive, and he hogs the covers.”
