Tuesday, April 20, 2004
Leno
"You know the Spanish word for Iraq? "Adios”."
"Spain now says they plan to withdraw their troops as soon as possible as opposed to waiting until June 30th as they originally agreed to do. And France is furious. That Spain is trying to break France’s record for quickest retreat."
"Today President Bush appointed John Negroponte as the new Ambassador to Iraq. Now how do you get to be Ambassador to Iraq? Make a large contribution to the Kerry campaign?"
"Starbucks is teaming up with the makers of Jim Beam whiskey to introduce a whiskey-flavored coffee. So now just instead of being late for work, you just don’t go in at all."
"I read the other day that Texas consumes more beer than any other state. You know what that means? Texans are the least likely to remember The Alamo."
"Pretty slow weekend here in Los Angeles. It rained on Saturday, the Dodgers are out of town, and the porn industry has been totally shut down. It was like a ghost town. There’s nothing to do."
"According to the daily news here in Los Angeles, experts say the porn industry might need government regulation. Finally, a job for Bill Clinton. Get him out of the house."
"You know the Spanish word for Iraq? "Adios”."
"Spain now says they plan to withdraw their troops as soon as possible as opposed to waiting until June 30th as they originally agreed to do. And France is furious. That Spain is trying to break France’s record for quickest retreat."
"Today President Bush appointed John Negroponte as the new Ambassador to Iraq. Now how do you get to be Ambassador to Iraq? Make a large contribution to the Kerry campaign?"
"Starbucks is teaming up with the makers of Jim Beam whiskey to introduce a whiskey-flavored coffee. So now just instead of being late for work, you just don’t go in at all."
"I read the other day that Texas consumes more beer than any other state. You know what that means? Texans are the least likely to remember The Alamo."
"Pretty slow weekend here in Los Angeles. It rained on Saturday, the Dodgers are out of town, and the porn industry has been totally shut down. It was like a ghost town. There’s nothing to do."
"According to the daily news here in Los Angeles, experts say the porn industry might need government regulation. Finally, a job for Bill Clinton. Get him out of the house."
